Captain's Log: Stardate 10165.2
Yesterday, I had the good fortune, thanks to a gracious invite from Captain Ohstrom, to take the helm of USS Frolic. I was very impressed with her power and speed. Despite some age issues with her warp drive (sails), the conditions were favorable and we did well. I am unable to go into more about our adventure, because details about two grown men on board a ship named Frolic falls well into Starfleet's "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy.
As for the Wednesday before, it appears that Ensign Nassau was, once again, trapped in the black hole known as work. Granted, his chances for escape would be far greater if his lips weren't tractor beamed to his superior's ass. Somehow, his priorities have changed, and I wonder if he hasn't been seduced by the dark side. Oh wait -- That's Star Wars. Never mind.
Lieutenant Weinstock was also AWOL, who seemed to be more facinated with the silicone melons of Janet Jackson than exploring the final frontier.
As for the race, we did well, especially considering our starting posistion. The crew worked hard and we gained some position. But will it be enough in the long run? The next four weeks will be crucial. We must sail fast and sail right.
Personal log entry: Ensign Heald, our self-proclaimed "Boat Bimbo", has enlisted my help to seek out a new life form for her to date. Depite her practical joke to introduce her 19 year-old roommate to the crew, whom we have named Six of Nine (69 -- get it?), I will always do my best to pimp out any member of the Enterprise crew. Interested parties know how to contact me.