Captain’s Log: Stardate 10360.0
Expecting another evening of thunderstorms and dead winds, we were once again pleasantly surprised at the nice breeze and beautiful conditions for last night’s race. We had a great start, played every lift & header, and, according to Mitch, correctly played the commercial traffic passing through the sector.

Martin Tune, of the still-to-be-launched USS Exuberance, was given a two-fold mission: While sailing with the USS Tolo, to make sure to stay behind the Enterprise and to beat the livin’ crap out of the gay Klingon ship, Neverland Express. I’d like to say that he went on this mission for the good of the Federation, however, I think his motivation came from the threat of lost nookie from an Enterprise ensign.

While the Enterprise did beat Tolo, Martin failed at keeping Neverland behind. In corrected time, it was Enterprise, Neverland and Tolo, but with Ear-Cheese, who finished 7 minutes later, correcting into first place. We seem to have a real problem with Ear-Cheese. Does anyone have a 20-foot Q-Tip?

In the overall scoring, the Enterprise remains in second place, but Tolo was knocked into fourth. Our reach for first is still a good possibility, especially now that Commander Richard will be in New Mexico where he will have whatever is left of his manhood stripped from him. Word has it we won’t see him again until September. Beach house party anyone?

Patty is ready to take the conn for this weekend’s Women Skippers Race and I have started taking valium. Yes, it is the “Women Skippers Race.” All of the suggestions that have been sent in for renaming the race are being ignored (Bitch Race 2003, T’n’A on the Bay, Tits and Tillers, Babes on Boats, and Ho’s on the Helm.)