Captain's Log: Stardate 11051.2
This past holiday weekend, as part of the celebration of the birth of this great country of ours, Lt. Zoraida and her boyfriend Steve joined Ellen and I on a short vacation cruise to the Harbor House Marina in Stamford and Sagamore Yacht Club in Oyster Bay.

I'm proud to report that the ship performed above and beyond expectations - it was especially nice hooking up to shore power and engaging the on-board refrigerator and automatic battery-charging systems. Accommodations were comfortable, the sailing was invigorating, the engine ran smoothly and the restaurants we chose offered delicious menu choices (if I could eat the bones from the ribs at Canterbury's Ale House and Grill's Barbecue Sampler, I would have.)

And, as I sat in a lounge chair during the sunset in Oyster Bay waiting for the fireworks to start, I began to wonder what it would be like to transition to a life of cruising rather than racing.

Don't worry, I'm not there yet - racing is still in my blood and I'll be back to screaming "Hike the fuck out, you fucking fuckity fuckers!!" in no time at all. Maybe even this Wednesday.

During the trip, Steve asked many questions about boats (which I was all too happy to answer) as he is considering the possibility of buying a small over-nighter sailboat in the future for him and Zoraida to use and cruise on. This, naturally, led to the discussion of boat names, having seen Mark Lasser's "New Freedom" on the way out (which Ellen believes would be a better name for a feminine product than a Catalina sloop,) as well as the sightings and stories behind boat names like the "Enterprise", "Millennium Falcon", "Runty Kid", "Alimony Payments" and, of course the semi-famous "Fujimo".

Still, Steve was considering somehow using Zoraida's name as part of the name of the new vessel. But, before you get all warm and fuzzy thinking about love and affection, here's just a few questions that could come up when you name a boat after your wife or girlfriend (using "Zoraida" as an example):

"How many men can Zoraida take?"
"How wide is Zoraida?"
"Can you sleep on Zoraida?"
"Is Zoraida fast?"
"Can Zoraida handle a good blow?"
"How far can Zoraida go?"
"Is Zoraida hard to control?"
"Is it difficult to get Zoraida out of a slip?"
"Is Zoraida overheating?"
"Will you loan Zoraida to a friend?"
and, my favorite,
"Will you put Zoraida on the hard this winter or keep her wet?"

Not exactly warm and fuzzy.