Stardate 11324.1

Captain's Log: Stardate 11324.1
While work begins this weekend on the Enterprise to prepare her for launch in mid May, that is not the big story of the month. The big story? I guess that can only be summed up with three words:


That's right, loglovers, our very on Lt. Kurt, for charity, accepted a razor to the head and is now BALD! And before you respond with the common "pic or it didn't happen" thing, here it is, in all its non-photoshopped glory:

I hope the charity did well, but now the rest of the crew has a perplexing choice ahead of them -- what nickname shall Kurt have to carry for the season? We now need to pick who he now looks the most like and assign him this new name.

So who do you think? Dr. Evil? Kojak? Lex Luthor? Ernst Blofeld? Shinzon of Romulus? What about Brittany Spears? Lt. Ilia from Star Trek The Motion Picture? Does he look like Sinead O'Connor? You decide!

So tough. We may need to rotate each week. But the Sinead O'Connor is eerily close... look at the eyebrows.

Anyway, stay tuned for updates on the Enterprise's progress.

Stardate 11321.9

Captain's Log: Stardate 11321.9
The Enterprise is set to launch on Saturday, May 18.

But, before we go on to the water, we must go Into Darkness:


Stardate 11317.3

Captain's Log: Stardate 11317.3
Last night, I discovered that one of the Enterprise crew, Lt. Warren "Kurt" vonRoeschlaub, has volunteered for St. Baldrick's, a charity that raises money where 100% of the proceeds go towards children's cancer research. Now Kurt could have chosen to, oh I don't know, sell cookies or provide information technology services, but nope, Kurt, in an attempt to raise $2,000 for this worthy cause, has volunteered to shave his head (perhaps taking the name St. Baldricks a little too literally.)

Now, I'm sure Kurt is hoping to emerge from this event looking like this:

But, much like Captain Kirk returning from the 23rd Century to warn of how much Seth MacFarlane would suck hosting the Oscars, we too have been to the future and now have startling evidence of what Kurt will look like after the charity event:

Actually, it may be an improvement anyway.

Nevertheless, if giving to help research on children's cancer isn't enough, I've done some Internet research and this tactic also has benefits towards the Enterprise's racing program. Studies say cyclists with bald heads experience 8.2% less drag than with those with full heads of hair.

Who knows how much extra speed the Enterprise will obtain with a shaven Kurt on upwind legs? Could be just the edge we need.

We thank Kurt for allowing us to conduct this research, which I have no doubt was part of his reasoning. Of course, we would need boatloads of empirical data seeing how much difference this would make before I even suggest that the rest of the crew, especially my wife, follow suit.

So if it's for the Enterprise, or, better yet, for children's cancer research, please do what you can and donate to this worthy and noble cause:

Stardate 11317.0

Captain's Log: Stardate 11317.0
Every once in a while, something amazing happens on the Enterprise. Here are just a few, all recorded in the previous log entries.

September 24, 2001 (Stardate 10173.1) - The first Starfleet commendation ever awarded for the creation and consumption of butt cake.

June 7, 2005 (Stardate 10543.3) - The first time we stepped on board the Enterprise-B.

June 25, 2007 (Stardate 10748.2) - The first of many occurrences of a spinnaker clusterfuck, leading this log to be #1 in search results for the term on Google.

July 30, 2007 (Stardate 10757.8) - The Enterprise takes a first-to-finish gun in the Around Long Island Regatta.

September 8, 2011 (Stardate 11168.8) - The Enterprise finishes and wins a Wednesday Night Race with just the main up for most of the last leg of the race.

September 21, 2011 (Stardate 11172.6) - The first Enterprise captain in Starfleet history gets engaged.

But on this Stardate, 11317.0, upon glancing through the records on Sailing Anarchy, we discovered this posting dated March 1, 2013 from John Esposito:

I will almost never do this, and probably will never do it again.
But I need to publicly apoligize to Edd for getting on him and abusing him over the years on this site, Although we may never see eye to eye, but after only being commodore for a week and sending out emails to the reps for votes and having to wait for a day or two for a response and from 1 club's rep NO response I don't know how he did this for 13 years and actually did a pretty damn good job. Little did I know what he did behind the scenes.
If I had it my way I would clen house on a couple of reps, but it's not up to me to decide on the reps but the yacht clubs to send a rep that actually wants to be part of the decision making {CIYC}.
So Edd for all the shit I gave you over the years , well done on the job you did for EBYRA, and I have my work cut out for me.
I actually look forward to working with you on certain aspects of EBYRA.

I know, I know, I'm getting soft!"

And, in case it disappears somehow, here's a screenshot:

And, yes, this is the same John Esposito, also known as Espo, who is the subject of the super-long thread entitled "Espo is a dick".

Thoroughly appreciated, but about as shocking as taking a bath with a plasma coil. Nevertheless, the apology is accepted and I'll be happy to provide John with advice along the way in what it takes to run EBYRA, especially in dealing with, as one person stated, "challenging personalities."

Meanwhile, all planning and preparations are being done to ensure the Enterprise's launch in May so that she may, once again, boldly go.